Friday, December 13, 2013

A Thank-You, A Love Letter, A moment of reflection

" I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." -John 8:12

I have spent so much of this life complaining about what I don't have, missing what isn't there, dreaming about what the future holds.

I have spent far too little time enjoying what I do have, holding close what is here, and cultivating what my day holds, today.

Self-proclaimed lover of snail mail, I am, far too often, in my letters to Jesus held tight, desperately praying for this, this, this, right now, now, now and how does this heart hold up to all the wanting instead of all the having? It is bruised and battered because I'm wishing away the now to move forward to the unpromised.

We were not guaranteed today, yet we woke up to sunshine and crisp air - so why am I so concerned with tomorrow's holdings and that apartment I want by February?

We were not guaranteed today - but we received it.
We were not deserving of this life - but we were given it.
We were not worthy of light - but darkness was removed.

So today, and I hope everyday after, I will remember that I have just what I need and am just where I am supposed to be, I will remember that I am not the architect of this plan, and I will remember that there is grace in every moment of my life - and blessings, too.

Today, I will shake off this title of entitlement that I have knighted myself with and wrap myself up in the knowledge that I have been given a life of light because of a love unfathomable.

This moment, I will put out a love letter for the world to see - because this is not a love, a relationship, that should be held captive to privacy or whispered in secret in the dark.

I have the light of life - because I am His, because He loves me so, because Grace.

Thank You for this life of light, sweet Father, a hundred thousand fevered, thank Yous.